SUICIDE NOTES

The rain fluctuates between drizzle and torrential
Messing with my mind, gnawing my tomorrow
Making me think things will always be like this,
They will never get better as they seemed
Always letting me down right when I think the worst is over
When the past is so done and am sauced up
For a new venture, a crazier adventure...

I feel certain that I am going mad again
I can’t go through another of these terrible times myself
And I shan’t recover this time
I begin to hear voices, and I can’t concentrate in my mind
So I am doing what seems the best thing to do
You have given me the greatest possible happiness I knew
You have been in every way all that anyone could be
I don’t think two people could have been happier until this

I can’t fight any longer, am drenched and am dry
I know that I am spoiling your life, that without me you could work
And you will I know
You see I can’t even write this properly... I can’t read.
What I want to say is I owe all the happiness of my life to you
You have been entirely patient with me and incredibly good
I want to say that —  so now everybody knows it
If anybody could have saved me it would have been you

Everything has gone from me but the certainty of your goodness
I can't hold myself back, I'm now embracing my weakness
I don’t think two people could have been happier than we have been
I have to let you go life for it's pain that will intervene
Leaving me in shambles, state of mind that's jumbled
Letting you go but with my appreciation shown on this suicide notes